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I matched with this guy on Tinder and every message was speaking directly to my heart and my soul and activating my mind. He lives four hours away, but we were finally able to meet a few months ago and on the Fourth of July he asked if he could be my boyfriend. This guy is absolutely incredible.


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You know how a lot of people, especially women, apologize too much? I spent last weekend with him and it was an actual dream. He held me in the most tender way multiple times and just let me be. A partner that I can trust. Monogamy, which I believe in and am looking for. Sex with a man is so much different from sex with a woman. How do I become comfortable with change like this? Your letter makes me so happy to read. Your openness to life, to new experiences, and to evolving out of your old thought patterns is clear. My life was almost destroyed by a man, but here I was continuing to let him destroy it by turning into someone who in her healing had the capacity to hurt others.

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I read books, listened to the news, heard the tearful stories of my friends, of strangers, of women in my family, and every single moment lived the rage inside me. It had taken me a year after what happened to me to even begin feeling the rage, to even begin tapping into the mess that was inside me — before, I had just been broken. When I found the rage, I finally found something that could hold all my cracked and split open pieces together.

He was struggling with his mental health, meanwhile I berated him for not reading the articles I needed him to, for not using the right words to refer to the right things, for not being able to tangibly understand entirely the literally soul-searing pain that me, and so many other people mostly femmes , were going through every single time we opened our computers or checked our phones or watched television during MeToo.

My relationship ended for many reasons, but certainly our incompatibility through my healing process was part of it, although he really did do his best , and for the first time I had the choice to decide whether I wanted to be around men or not. All of a sudden I was beginning to heal. I had patience when men asked questions, I tapped into the parts of me that had nothing to do with rage, but with my happiness. If you want to know how to love a man and to make it last, see Step 1 to be on your way.

To love a man, start by making him feel special through affection. One way to show your affection is by offering genuine compliments to let him know you love and appreciate him just the way he is. For more tips on how to love a man, like why you should have personal conversations in private, read on!

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Categories: Love and Romance. Learn more Respect his independence. Loving a man doesn't mean trying to do each and every last thing with him. In fact, if you really want to love a man, then you have to show it by letting him do his own thing once in a while. If he likes reading in his study or working on his carpentry skills in the garage, you don't have to hover around every two seconds asking what he's up to or if he needs anything. Sure, it's great to share interests with your loved one, but it's equally important to respect the fact that he'd like to do his own thing from time to time.

Leaving him alone when he just wants some peace is a way to show him your real love.

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Give him his "guy time. Though he shouldn't go out boozing with his buddies without you every night in the week, every once in a while, a man needs to just unwind and hang out with a bunch of other men.

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There's nothing wrong with that, just like there's nothing wrong with the fact that you want time with your girlfriends. The next time he has "guy time," don't be suspicious, call him a million times while he's out, or resent him for spending time with his friends. If you're cool with letting him hang out with his friends sometimes, then he'll appreciate you even more when he comes back to you. If this is the case, then you will have to have a talk with him.

Avoid saying "I told you so. Though sometimes it may be important to get your message across, it's not as important as being part of a positive, mutually-beneficial relationship. Okay, so maybe your man was wrong about something, and he already feels bad about it. Ask yourself if it's worth it to say, "I told you so," and to make him look and feel like a bigger fool. If you really care for him, then you'll sympathize with him instead of making him feel worse. Sure, there are times when you really feel like getting your point across and want him to get the message so he doesn't make the same mistake again.

That's okay, too, as long as you know how to pick your battles. Give him time to unwind.

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Sometimes a man may just need a little quiet time to himself. If he just got home from work, or you just got home and he seems like he's doing his own thing, you don't always have to start talking about everything and hanging out over a glass of wine. Though this is the way many women unwind, this is not the way that most men always like to relax, so you have to be understanding of the fact that he may just want a little quiet and some TV time to relax a bit.

Sure, it's important to spend time together, but you shouldn't make him feel guilty if he needs some alone time. Try not to take it personally. Don't try to talk everything through. Yeah, many women like to sit and talk about all of their problems because they think that this is the best way to solve them. But not so with men. Though it's important to talk about the things that are bothering you, many men don't like to talk the second they are upset and need some time to think everything through on their own.

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If you know he's had a bad day or you're going through a rough patch, try giving it a little time instead of trying to talk it over the second that it happens. It may be your thing to talk about something the second it's happened, but you have to respect the fact that he may not want to talk right away. On the other hand, that doesn't mean you should never talk about your feelings. Really listen to him. An important part of loving a man is listening to what he has to say.

You don't always have to be the one who is talking, telling him how much you love him, or starting a conversation about how his day went. If he's talking to you, then don't interrupt or wait for the time when you can say something. Hear him out, especially if he doesn't open up to you as often as you'd like. Once he's said his part, you'll have a sense of what he wants -- either some advice or just a sympathetic ear. Listening is a skill that can be developed. Work on latching on to the details of what he says and mentioning them later -- he'll be impressed by how much you care.

Don't demean him. Though you don't have to make your man feel like a macho man or a superhero all the time, one of the worst things you can do is to make him feel like he's about two feet tall. And he texts me more than college days and he also set me up to meet his sisters and family. At last he proposed to me and confess his feeling to me but I ask him why he love me and he said because I cared for him.